Elder Ioanichie Bălan: Who Can Give Me Joy?
But after so many years of running and searching, I didn’t find what I needed. Who can give me joy? Who can give me rest for my soul? Who can give me what I was searching for?
I am hungry and thirsty for You, Lord. I am thirsty, I am hungry, Lord; I am very exhausted after all these years that I have gone astray on the paths of this earth. For 25 years, I have wandered on the road of sin. For 25 years, I lie like the paralytic of Bethesda and I have no one to put me in the bath of repentance to find salvation. And when I remember the first years of my life, tears stream down my face. Because I was born in sin, I lived without any guidance, I strayed on so many city streets in order to find rest and consolation for my soul. But after so many years of running and searching, I didn’t find what I needed. Who can give me joy? Who can give me rest for my soul? Who can give me what I was searching for? Then, like a foreign traveler, hungry and weary, I detached myself from this alien, vain world and I came to you, my Jesus. Only here did I find You; only here did I find a little consolation, relief, and hope.
—Fr. Ioanichie Bălan (d. Nov 22, 2007)